Art of Sexual Magic

A couple of years ago I started writing ‘The non-ejaculation diary’ (but maybe the ejaculation diary is a more accurate title) documenting my experiences in relation to increasing sexual energy. I’m not sure if I’ll ever publish the entries so today I thought I’d share this one:

26th July 2022

After a few days of using my all energy for work my general feeling of hornyness dissipated. I had little desire for intimacy (a kiss or cuddle), I felt I had little left to give and only space to receive a massage or conscious touch. In the days previous with one woman I share an astral soul connection with, her energy came into my field twice just before sleeping and each time I wanted to orgasm, both times I took the energy up my spine but the last one felt too close to an actual release. After this for a few days my energy felt quite stuck. Today exhausted but not having enough time to actually rest, I tuned into this astral connection to see if it could teach me anything but it felt depleted, I felt a little guilt like I’d ruined something that was perviously inspiring me, but it’s not that I had masturbated or anything I just breathed into the energy that was there and my body reacted strongly (it’s funny how hours of sexual stimulation may not make me cum but a certain energy in an unexpected moment and I don’t even need to touch myself to find an orgasm). I went into some of my private sexual shadow fantasies looking at how to make these healthy, while they move through the fight of good and evil in order to jump start my life force again. I will not share all of my private fantasies here as you should find your own but as it got too dark in that if this fantasy was a reality in the next moment I would be close to death, I ejaculated. Immediately I felt better. I craved a protein bar and made a caco and topped up on Ashwagandha and Tongkat Ali (good herbs for men) and then I checked my email and all within the space of 10 minutes after the release the woman I had the astral connection with the nights prior messaged me to say hi, I sold another advanced training and two online courses, all within 10 minutes after selling nothing for approx 5 days. Straight away I feel my energy and motivation coming back. The experience highlights many of the same questions I struggle with, in that my spiritual practices need to be much stronger in-order to not fall into shadow work and how immensely grateful I am to attract Tantrikas and Priestesses into my life to share meditation, practices and astral connections with, to inspire each other, and how one day if I am to sustain the life I love I need to build a community where personal Tantrik and sexual practices can bridge all of these worlds and allow us to find great depth through subtlety, and of course this still leaves me struggling with how the idea of monogamy turns me on but how impractical I find it in being able to keep my personal level of consciousness high, to be inspired by all the muses I have a love for and connection with that very rarely and does need to equate to sex.

#nonejaculation
#nofap
#seamenretention
#sexualenergy
#manifestwithsex


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